I CAN HAZ THE BEST DAY EVAR?

My downstairs neighbours usually aren’t “cat people” (by which I mean that at least one of them is abjectly terrified of cats). But they aren’t “mouse people” times a hundred, which is approximately how many mice we could hear stampeding around behind their fridge. Enter Mojo.

Now Mojo is not very good at catching mice. One time he found one and batted it around for a bit. Eventually he lost sight of the mouse and I watched him sit there, confused, peering all over the room hoping to spot the errant rodent. Which was, at that very moment, hiding between Mojo’s own front paws. Yeah, directly below his quivering nostrils. So much for cats being the perfect predators.

All this to say that my hopes were not high, but I like to help a neighbour in need, so I opened my apartment door and let the little shaggy bear loose in the house. (Juno, my more cautious female cat, wanted no part of the action and refused to leave her sunbeam.)

About a half-hour later, I heard him trotting back up both flights of stairs, making a strange strangled mrrowling noise. There was something in his mouth, and he’d brought it up all 30 stairs to show me.

Fig. 1: He was acting all nonchalant but his little heart was filled with pride.

Fig. 1: He was acting all nonchalant but his little heart was filled with pride.

Figure 1 depicts the little guy finally doing what he was born to do. Scare mice to death? In the back of my closet, like he did in my old apartment, so they basically liquefied over the long weekend and stunk up the whole house? Nope, not any more: this was a perfect kill, its little body limp and barely even bloodied, one eye popped out of existence, the other staring blankly into eternity. I praised the kitteh extravagantly and delicately disposed of his prey when he wasn’t looking. Soon enough he wandered back downstairs, and an hour later, heralded by more of the weird gargling mmmmrrrllling, he was back.

Kill by Mojo.  Napkin by Stamper.

Kill by Mojo. Napkin by Stamper.

Several hours later, he outdid himself and chased yet one more mouselet out into the open. My downstairs neighbour, the one who’s animal-phobic, was home alone when Mojo found mouse #3, and with nobody to rely on except himself, he experienced an epic moment of truth and managed to trap and kill the final mouse independently, in the process conquering his fears of both rodents and felines.

I’m very proud of everybody. And I think today was pretty much the bestest day a cat could ever have.

Fig 3: Tastes like chicken.

Fig 3: Tastes like chicken.

7 Responses to I CAN HAZ THE BEST DAY EVAR?

  1. wow! unbelievable. my cats make that mrrow sound every night, but they show up with a fake fuzzy mouse cat toy. yep, they are posers…but your guy, well, your guy wins big time. congrats for having the coolest guy around!

  2. Kelly says:

    I find it oddly yet deeply touching that Mojo brought his first kill straight to Momma Stamp. What a bond you two have! Bravo Mojo!

  3. HuggPress says:

    Basically, your cat is an unpaid yet hired assassin. I think you might end up on the mouse mafia hit list, Stamp, watch out. Also, they will eat your soap! At least, they have done to mine in the past. Weird.

  4. […] Mojo is a 7 year old Maine Coon cat who lives in Toronto. […]

  5. Walkley Blade says:

    We here in Sheffield, UK, also have a small female cat named Juno. It took her a year or so to figure it out, but she now a regular little killing machine. Got 3 mice in 3 hours the other night, and she also has a penchant for destroying nests full of baby birds, which is most definitely NOT COOL. We are seriously considering re-naming her Myra (Hindley), after the infamous Moors Murderess.

  6. Lonewulf says:

    This is hilarious! I can imagine you taking out the camera and choosing the right angles, composing the shots and crouching down to the cat’s eye level and snapping away! Priceless! I used to have two cats (may they rest in peace) and they used to play with the dead mice before bring it to me as a present. Thanks for those “wonderful” memories of my feline exterminators.

  7. […] check under her “Best of Pageslap” tab: I am not a crazy cat lady; Collars for cats; I can haz the best day evar; and Flash webpage […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: