Patton Oswalt (the stand-up comic who, among many other impressive things, did the voice of Remy the Rat in Ratatouille) has posted the commencement address he gave to his alma mater:
Bob Hope once said, “When I was twenty, I worried what everything thought of me. When I turned forty, I didn’t care what anyone thought of me. And then I made it to sixty, and I realized no one was ever thinking of me.” And then he pooed his pants, but that didn’t make what he said any less profound.
This speech is a blindingly good piece of writing. Patton Oswalt is so effortlessly profound it makes me want to sit at home in my underwear forever and never try anything ever again.