Disgusting things in cans that should not have been canned, Volume One

May 1, 2009

Time for a new blog series!

Let’s get this going right with Exhibit A:
CANNED WHOLE CHICKEN.

canned whole chicken

Wow, sounds like a real timesaver! And it looks pretty good on the label, hey? Let’s crank open that can and see.

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Hey look, schmaltz! (Excuse me, did you say something? Oh you were just retching quietly with your mouth shut? Sorry, my bad.)
Let’s birth this bird from its tin canal.

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Ooh, it comes with a nice clear gristle jelly, I didn’t see that little extra on the label. It’s sure to be flavourful.
I think it’s time to brown up this bird in a nice warm oven.

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Note that this poor carcass has been cooked not once but twice and still can’t manage to get a decent colour on. Also, is it just me, or does this chicken bear an uncomfortable resemblance to Ötzi the Iceman?
(Too soon?)

If you want to know more about this chicken (and who wouldn’t, really) Tracy’s full story (and a link to lots more great photos) is here.

Also, unbelievably, a British man with terrible judgement ate a canned chicken that was 50 years old… and he lived!
Via Metafilter.


Email punversation.

May 1, 2009

Viktor: Here’s a good article on Hamas [link]
Gord: I thought you said hummus. Really.
Viktor: I said it was a good article by Bobbie Ganoush
Hanna: /Groan
Me: Oh peas.
Lily: Merguez is you guyz could be at this all night.
Viktor: I’m tzatzinking you’re right.
Rob: This thread is so funny I almost falafel my chair.
Lily: Olive punning with you guys. Does Hummus practice Is-lamb?
Hanna: Wow. This is really pita-full.
Me: Not funny guys. There’s a schwarma going on right now.

My friends are going to hell. Or possibly hel.
It was an interesting article, though.


Flying Penguin Masthead

May 1, 2009

If you’re reading this blog on an RSS feed, hop on over to the main page for a sec to see the new masthead I designed!